not a good day

stomach ache..since yesterday. gosh..with sour faces around dowh! i need the energy to continue my work. deadlines are chasing me instead of i'm chasing them. My head is pounding and stomach is aching for food.. but cant eat anything yet. i have to fast till late afternoon, or else it will aching more and i have to visit ms.toilet more frequent!!

I'm praying and hope god hear my plea and help me!

~red

damn bored

I wish I have objectives in live. it's not that i'm going to kill myself because I do not know what to do. it is just that i wanted to do more better than what i am doing at the moment. fel lack of inspiration. i feel chained with some matters although to some people the matters that i am facing at the moment is norm, just like other people. Gosh, sometimes i really lonely. i dont have good friends like last time. friends who could support you in any moment that you needed them. so isolate from any activities. sometimes i feel stupid, lack of energy and hopeless in every angle of life. but if other people see me, definitely they would say that i should be grateful since i have what i have at the moment. how i wish i could feel needed and happy and content with my situation now. I really wish god helps me to meet a really best friend that i ever have, share thoughts and  pain and joy together.

used

Sometimes, I felt, I've been used by people around me. dowh! But anyways, things happen for reasons. God knows what's the best for you. But at the moment, have to juggle between family and work, really tire me out. World is so gloomy to my eyes now. The hatred of people taking advantage on me, irritates me more..erm

~red